Me Counting Money

“SHAPPOW!” more like “Chappelle!”

I pray to Victorious King Jesus that this is a joke.

Go to 2:20

Maybe this blog is a *bad* idea…

Floyd Mayweather, Jr. banks at First National Bank of Bedside Trust—undoubtedly across the street from Bedside Baptist Church (where there’s a cover-charge). Get it?! COVER charge! Funny because it’s a church, but also because of BED COVERS!!! No? Okay. Just WATCH.

Real question: how can I get a loveseat like that?

Beaumont, TX. Oh, and there’s a documentary.

I think this video should be called: “I hate my brother, and we both generally disrespect who’s probably our uncle”

Missing is the part with the ATM.

Of course he has money. Look at his crazy modern interior decorating. Also, I think his name is Kelly, and Kelly is gotting money.

This is confusing, because I’m completely on board to help him count, but he’s not helping me help him. This is worse than double-dutch.

The youngest bawse we’ve seen thus far. If anyone knows what language they’re speaking, please post a translation! Thanks.

Who needs school? These guys are RICH. Missing is the first part of the video where the cameraman says: “Say man, think we have enough for some of that tasty Chinese food to your left?” Look, if you can make a lot of money—-by all means, drop out—but not until you learn to COUNT. I think you have enough.

More impressive than his money stacks, is the fact that famed painter Claude Monet travelled through time to show us video of him counting what are doubtless the earnings from a lucrative painting sale. Sadly, the space-time continuum catches up with him, and apparently he explodes into a cloud of improbability at the very end. WATCH.

This gentleman is kind enough to give us his full name, so feel free to Facebook him. Another culinary reference—-I believe it was “guap” which is how people in the D (where it’s terribly cold) refer to guacamole, a delicious “green” “creamy” offering of Southwestern fare.

The first woman in our group. This is clearly money she won in a settled law suit for an accident that left her deaf and mute. Get paper, mama.

Again, an instant quick reference to ‘cake.” I need to go to culinary school. Around 1:10, it becomes eerily like an episode of Sesame Street.

Again, I can’t hear well. Sounds like they’re saying “count my dough money!” And then there’s a lot of scenes of him in a kitchen, so clearly his pizza business is doing well.